Crap. This already sucks.

We are now active with all 3 agencies and 1 attorney! When I first got our home study packet back in July, I cried because I was so overwhelmed with all the hoops and paperwork and requirements. I never thought we would get to this point. Here we are. But...

Waiting sucks. Big time.

This is the hardest part so far, and it's only been a week. I guess with all the home study requirements and applications I felt more useful because we were actually doing something. Now we're doing nothing....but waiting.

Since becoming active, we've received info on two birthmothers. Once we see the info, we let the agency know if we are interested in having our profile shown and then the birthmother will choose from there. The first situation we had to turn down because it was over our budget, and the second we had to say no because it involved extended travel. I know it's only a couple of weeks and I should be glad that we are already getting birthmother info. I just can't help being discouraged and wondering if we will ever get our baby. In December it will be two years since my BFP. Two years later and still no family. I never imagined we'd be waiting this long or that having a family would be so hard. I really don't want to go through another holiday season childless. Last weekend I took my dog to a costume contest and pet parade. It was a lot of fun, but I can't help being sad when I see all the kids dressed up in their costumes. When will it be my turn to buy kid's costumes? My poor dog now has six Halloween costumes.......
Recently on SNL it was said said that dressing up your dog is a way to tell your neighbors you can't have kids. Screw you Seth. You have no idea what IF is like and you can kiss my ass. Besides, my dog is damn cute dressed up, isn't she? Here she is struttin' her stuff in the parade. Notice the pom-poms- my husband sewed them!

Sorry girl, we will never stop dressing you up, even if we do eventually get our baby. You're too cute!